登陆注册
670700000007

第7章 The Paradox of Happiness (1)

·Timothy·

What is the definition of“happiness?”Is it material wealth filled with fancy cars,a dream house,extravagant furs and jewelry? Or is happiness simply having a roof over your head? Food in the fridge? Having a child? A pet? A swimming pool? A designer Gucci bag? Parents? Grandchildren? Love? Money? The perfect job? Winning the Lottery?

According to the American Heritage Dictionary,“happiness”is derived from the Middle English word hap—meaning“Luck.”But does happiness really have anything to do with“luck?”Based on this description,one could assume that if you avoided a fatal traffic accident but got fired by coming late to work,you would be filled with “happiness?”Is it luck or what you make of it? Maybe,“happiness”is exactly defined by its indirect alias: happiness—perhaps,happiness is in fact defined by the fortune that we permit to happen.

Do you recall a time—let’s say when you were about 5 years old—what defined happiness back then? Was it getting a puppy for Christmas? Or maybe,you were a child of divorce;and all you wanted was for Mom and Dad to get back together again? Then as you got older,you were hoping that someone would ask you to the prom that would’ve made your day,maybe your life for the moment. During college,good grades made you happy,but it was short-lived. Because in the real world,you had to look for a job,and competition was stark. It’s an employer’s world you thought. But then,you got the perfect job—now you could be happy—or could you?

Life requires more than just what we want. Inevitably,one must understand to truly find“happiness,”he must make his own happiness“happen”. Sounds a bit redundant,but truthfully,there is no set guidelines that will bring one happiness. There is no“magic wand”we can wave to bring joy into our lives. Human nature thrives on the thrill of the chase. We dream and we hope for the next big break—it is the grand adventure of living.

We are hopeless creatures of comfort. We like having and accumulating things. Whether one admits to it or not,to a certain degree,we all try to keep up with“the Jones”. We work so we can pay our rents,mortgages,credit card debts,school loans,car payments... the list goes on and on. And at some point,we realize,that aside from having most of what we want,we still aren’t happy. Now since we’ve learned to adapt to new standards which we’ve created for ourselves,we find that we have less time,less patience,less sleep,which equates to more stress,more worry and more aggravation. So,is happiness honestly just comprised of“things”?

Sometimes,we virtually trade our lives for not only basic necessities,but for excessive items and services as well. We become so obsessed with finding happiness,that we lose sight of the fact that happiness is within—always. Certainly you’ve heard of individuals trying to“find themselves”,or“rediscover themselves”. The reason they are attempting these innovative approaches is because they are seeking inner happiness. But the point has been missed: Happiness is already there.

Disappointments and tragedies in life will come and go,but happiness never leaves you. The human’s capacity to be resilient to trials is unfathomable. We can lose our jobs,but be grateful for our spouses. We can lose our homes to nature,but be thankful to be alive.

Happiness is a perception of each individual. We are instinctively compelled to find fault in our lives. By human nature,we begin our“fault-finding”mission the moment we’re capable of free-thinking. It is then,that we lose sense of self-worth and the bigger picture of vitality altogether. Stuck in the patterns of the happiness paradox,we simply cannot find where our happiness has gone.

It’s not a matter of bargaining,it’s not an issue of money or fame— instead,happiness is what you resolve to accept. If we live through optimistic hope;if we dare to dream;if we empower ourselves to fully live;then we have regained our sense of happiness. There is no in between. There is no other replacement. We only have one physical life to live— we have no choice but to make the most of it.

矛盾幸福感

蒂莫西

“幸福”是什么?幸福是拥有豪华的汽车、理想的居室、名贵的裘皮和珠宝等物质上的富足吗?或者,简单的只是有个遮风避雨的住所,冰箱里有食物,有孩子、宠物、游泳池、个性的包,有父母、子孙、有爱情、金钱和理想的工作,彩票中奖了呢?

在《美国传统字典》中,幸福是从中古英语“Hap”一词演变而来的。“Hap”意为“好运”。但是,幸福真的与“好运”有关联吗?基于此,想想看,如果你在一场必死无疑的交通事故中幸免于难,却因此迟到,导致被老板炒鱿鱼。对此,你会感到“幸福”吗?这是好运吗?还是要看个人如何看待这个问题呢?或许,确切地说,幸福的定义应当直接从它的词源来看——事实上,幸福或许就是命中注定要发生的事情。

你能回忆起你5岁时对幸福的理解吗?那时,幸福是从圣诞树上摘下的一只小狗吗?或者爸爸妈妈离婚了,你唯一的愿望就是他们能和好如初,重新生活在一起?当你渐渐长大,你希望有人会邀请你参加舞会,希望所有的日子都凝固在那一天、那一刻。上大学期间,考试得了高分让你无比开心,但这种幸福感都是短暂的。因为在现实中,你得找一份工作,而社会竞争也相当激烈。于是,你就会想,这是一个雇主的世界。随后,你找到了一份理想的工作——现在的你很开心,是吗?

生活向我们索要的远比我们想要的多。一个人必须明白,要想真正找到幸福,他就必须让自己幸福。可能听起来有些多余,但确是如此——生活中,没有能带来幸福的现成指南,也没有挥一挥就能带来欢乐的魔棒。人性在追求幸福的刺激中不断升级、完善。我们梦想着、期望着下一个大的转变——这就是生活中的大冒险了。

同类推荐
  • 鲁滨逊漂流记(中小学生必读丛书)

    鲁滨逊漂流记(中小学生必读丛书)

    本书是被称为“现代小说之父”的英国著名作家丹尼尔·笛福的代表作。在西方文学史上, 鲁滨孙的形象众所周之, 他航海遇险, 一个人漂流到南美洲某荒岛, 靠着双手和工具, 造房子, 修田地、种粮食, 养牲畜, 还从土著的刀下救了一个人, 取名礼拜五, 收为自己的奴隶……鲁滨孙用28年的时间把荒岛建设成为一个世外桃源, 最后又奇迹般地回到欧洲, 成为巨富
  • 我的世界我做主

    我的世界我做主

    《魅力英文:我的世界我做主》为英汉对照典藏版。非常适合中学生、大学生及对英语学习充满热情、抱有热望的人们来了解英文欣赏英文。该书收录了百于则经典哲理美文,其内容涉及青春、爱情、理想等方面,从不同的视角阐释了人生的种种道理。在面临挑战、遭受挫折之时,《魅力英文:我的世界我做主》会给您以力量……
  • 那些激励我前行的身影(每天读一点英文)

    那些激励我前行的身影(每天读一点英文)

    精选历史名人、商界骄子、演艺明星的演说,让你在诵读名句中,领略成功之道!《每天读一点英文》是一套与美国人同步阅读的中英双语丛书,该丛书由美国英语教师协会推荐
  • 英文爱藏:淡定的人生不寂寞

    英文爱藏:淡定的人生不寂寞

    学英语不再枯燥无味——吴文智编著的《淡定的人生不寂寞》内文篇 目均取自国外最经典、最权威、最流行、最动人的篇章,中英双语,适于 诵读,提升阅读能力;学英语不再沉闷辛苦——优美的语言、深厚的情感 、地道的英文,让我们在阅读这些动人的绝美篇章时,不仅能够提升生活 质量,丰富人生内涵,更能够轻松提升英文领悟能力,体味英文之...
热门推荐
  • 傻子王爷无情妃

    傻子王爷无情妃

    一只毒蝎子,彻底断送了她年轻的生命!别人只知道,那个软弱没主见的女人被迫嫁给一个痴傻呆闷的七皇子。殊不知,她早已不再是“她”!面对痴傻只会憨笑的美男,她气愤难填!你傻,本美女就医好你,谁知医好后,遭到嫌弃,却换来一纸休书,气愤之下,她恨不得与他同归于尽……
  • 兵王之王

    兵王之王

    我笑看鲜血,我疯狂不屈;脊骨为国而生,热血为国流淌。我为战斗而生,我是兵王之王。
  • 契约老公,别乱来

    契约老公,别乱来

    强势御姐竹若依事业得意情场失意,某日此剩女一不小心用一纸契约将自己卖给痞美男……竹若依之【乌龙契约】某日此剩女被竹爸灌醉打包送到某男房中(不料竹爸却是糊涂虫,送错了房间。)剩女脸不红耳不热,纤手捏着美男俊脸:小朋友皮肤蛮水嫩的,教姐姐如何保养……美男墨子昊表面看来青靓白净皮肤白嫩滑溜对此御姐本是兴趣乏乏却觉那只随意在他脸上吃着豆腐的滚烫玉手,掠过之处意外地让他感觉阵阵酥麻……干柴烈火,该发生的……却什么也没有发生!剩女吃完美男豆腐,毫无醉态极具条理地变出一纸契约递予美男:如无异议,签了这个吧!美男以一目十行之速度看完,大笔一挥,一脸英勇就义的悲壮。后续之【不平等契约】对老婆垂涎已久却一直吃不到口的男人:老婆,今晚我们来玩爱爱游戏……漂亮老婆一脸淡定,手指在键盘上飞快敲击,头也不抬:契约上没有这个。抓狂的男人脸部抽搐,连忙翻出十页纸厚的所谓契约,细看林林总总五十项,居然全是保障老婆大人的条款。欲哭无泪的某男不死心,拿着放大镜一条条细看。功夫不负有心人,终于让他找到最末一条是关于他的权利:除老婆之外,可和任何人发生亲密关系。某美男吐血倒地……追加之【更新契约】某美男微眯桃花眼,放出炽热电波:老婆,咱们宪法都不是完美的,更何况是咱们的契约。强烈要求更新,与时俱进!傲娇老婆被电得周身舒爽:来说说,那里要更新?如何更新?某美男飞快翻过十页,修长手指指着最末一条:这里这里!加一个“不”字!傲娇老婆眼尾扫过:哦?这条?行呀!美男老公大喜挥笔疾书,旋即:OK,给你!傲娇老婆一看:除老婆之外,不可和任何人发生亲密关系。傲娇老婆吐血倒地……【啰嗦之言】此文宠溺无限,情节温馨轻松,不喜虐者请放心入坑!*强力推荐几篇超宠文文【哥哥是只妖】墨但为嘛人交男友我交男友,人家是甜蜜温馨外加整天如糖粘豆……可我桃花,美女一只,却行情惨淡,偶尔有个帅哥抛个媚眼,隔天这帅哥准是断个胳臂折个腿……【捡来的狐妖小兽】仙人笔拒绝小三,拒绝出轨,专爱一对一。凤瑶捡到一只很萌的小狗狗,满心欢喜地抱回家圈养起来。【废帝霸妃】阿痣墨霸妃就霸妃吧,霸妃被宠着没什么不好的昂~而且废帝夫君人前各种柔弱的,可以欺负调戏各种爽昂~【娘子,夜深了】木简荨“娘子,夜深了~”月光光,光晕暧昧,醉生梦死床上,坐有美人夫君七个,各个目光如虎似狼!
  • 碎了时光,暖了情殇

    碎了时光,暖了情殇

    原来,委曲求全和他同在一个屋檐下。生活上劝他多多珍惜未婚妻,工作上又为他卖命加班争业绩。从送公司,送房子,认做姐弟。或许都是天注定的,弟弟突然一去不复返,送车子到送未婚夫,逢人便说她有一个帅小弟。到最后,有一种爱,又要忙着管理公司,亮如橘色,那年他们十六七,姐姐为此念叨十来年,碎了时光,可他居然不记得她这个姐姐。可到最后送丈夫,不是看到他被人追着说流氓,就是见他倒卖成人用品。为了让他早点恢复记忆,暖了情殇!--情节虚构,还要应对被他伤了心的情人,再见时,请勿模仿,他更是当起了甩手掌柜。他却一直杳无音讯。十年人事两不知,她都默默的接受。让她又要忙着生活。人品变差了没关系,她却迟迟不肯踏出那一步
  • 傻子王爷无情妃

    傻子王爷无情妃

    一只毒蝎子,彻底断送了她年轻的生命!别人只知道,那个软弱没主见的女人被迫嫁给一个痴傻呆闷的七皇子。殊不知,她早已不再是“她”!面对痴傻只会憨笑的美男,她气愤难填!你傻,本美女就医好你,谁知医好后,遭到嫌弃,却换来一纸休书,气愤之下,她恨不得与他同归于尽……
  • 狗岁月

    狗岁月

    ,饥饿和苦难。凄婉的爱情,《狗岁月》是一部独特的残酷成长小说,无望的生或死但是,以及他们的同学等人,命运的坎坷,它还是充满了人间的温情和正义,此书描写了主人公双胞胎大狗和小狗,是真正具有阅读快感而又让人感动的作品
  • 末世之喜乐平安

    末世之喜乐平安

    她无意中来到地球,看到这里灵力充沛但却无人懂的利用,正开心的时候却被困在一个刚刚死亡的女婴体内。他刚经历丧母之痛,看到被遗弃的婴儿想到自己,于是某人被收养。被养了十多年,她确定这是个好男人!正想好好培养感情,丫的!这是要闹哪样儿啊!遍地的丧尸我虽然不在乎,但家里这个我不能不管啊!苏平安,难怪以前对我这么好呢!感情在这儿等着可劲儿的折腾我呢!
  • 你的高薪怎么来

    你的高薪怎么来

    《你的高薪怎么来:实现职员和企业双赢的工作理念》获得高薪并不是一件很难的事情,即使永远是在给人打工,只要能如《你的高薪怎么来:实现职工和企业双赢的工作理念》中所言,按照敬业、专业、效率、绩效、成本、提升、晋升、人脉这八个方面进行修炼学习,你也能很快获得高薪。因为这八个要点都是按照高薪人才之所以能获得高薪的标准来设计的,或者说,这八个要点都是老板能够给你高薪的参考标准。达到了这八个标准,老板就会很乐意给你高薪。
  • 嫡女棣王妃

    嫡女棣王妃

    “姨娘,夫人似乎断气了~”“哼!这么一碗药都下去了,难道她还能活着不成?”“那这······”一个年纪稍长的人朝着这位称作姨娘的人示意了一下自己手中的婴儿,似乎有些犹豫,“这好歹是个男孩,现在夫人已经死了,如果姨娘把他占为己有,然后得了这府中的中馈······”“嬷嬷?!”女子也不等她的话说完,就打断了她,“你记住了,我恨死了这个女人,她的儿子,只能随着她去,我就是以后自己生不出儿子,抱养别人的,也不会要她的。把他给我扔马桶里面溺了,对外就说一出生就死了!”猩红的嘴唇,吐出来的话却是格外的渗人。嬷嬷还想说什么,动了动嘴,却是一句话也没有说,转身朝着后面放着马桶的地方走去。却是没有发现旁边地上一个穿着有些破旧的衣服的小女孩此刻正瞪大了眼睛看着她们两。这是什么情况?自己不是被炸死了吗?怎么会······于此同时,脑中不断有记忆闪现出来,她们是自己的母亲和刚出生的弟弟啊?!不行,先救人。转头看见旁边谁绣花留下的针线跟剪刀,想到自己前世的身手,拿起一根绣花针就朝着那个嬷嬷飞了过去,却在半路上掉落下来,暗骂一声,这人是什么破身体。却引得那两个人听见动静看了过来。女人阴狠的盯着她,“你居然没有死?”微微眯起眼睛,自己的前身也是被她们弄死的了,看样子她们谁也不会放过,抓起旁边的剪刀就冲了过去。随着几声惨叫声,从此以后,府中府外都传遍了她的“美名”——凤家大小姐心肠歹毒,刺伤了府中无数的人,宛如一个疯子。
  • 傻子王爷无情妃

    傻子王爷无情妃

    一只毒蝎子,彻底断送了她年轻的生命!别人只知道,那个软弱没主见的女人被迫嫁给一个痴傻呆闷的七皇子。殊不知,她早已不再是“她”!面对痴傻只会憨笑的美男,她气愤难填!你傻,本美女就医好你,谁知医好后,遭到嫌弃,却换来一纸休书,气愤之下,她恨不得与他同归于尽……