登陆注册
670600000066

第66章 第二十二条军规 (1)

Catch-22

故事发生在第二次世界大战期间,美国空军的

一支飞行大队驻守在意大利以南地中海上的一个小岛

上。主人公约塞连是这支飞行大队的上尉轰炸手。他

本来是一个正直勇敢、富有爱国心的青年。起初,他

抱着为祖国而战的信念,出色地完成了任务,因而被

提拔为上尉,还获得了一枚勋章。后来他发现周围的

人都在暗算他,企图置他于死地。他竭力要保全自己

的生命,他要逃离这个“世界”。最后,约塞连恍然大悟,

第二十二条军规原来是一个骗局,他临阵逃脱,跑到

瑞典去寻找避难所。

[ 美] 约瑟夫·海勒( Joseph Helle)

The Texan

It was love at first sight.

The first time Yossarian saw the chaplain he fell madly in

love with him. Yossarian was in the hospital with a pain in his liver

that fell just short of being jaundice. The doctors were puzzled

by the fact that it wasn’t quite jaundice. If it became jaundice they

could treat it. If it didn’t become jaundice and went away they

could discharge him. But this just being short of jaundice all the

time confused them.

Each morning they came around,three brisk and serious

men with efficient mouths and inefficient eyes,accompanied by

brisk and serious Nurse Duckett,one of the ward nurses who

didn’t like Yossarian. They read the chart at the foot of the bed

and asked impatiently about the pain. They seemed irritated when

he told them it was exactly the same.

“Still no movement?”the full colonel demanded.

The doctors exchanged a look when he shook his head.

“Give him another pill.”Nurse Duckett made a note to give

Yossarian another pill,and the four of them moved along to the

next bed. None of the nurses liked Yossarian. Actually,the pain

in his liver had gone away,but Yossarian didn’t say anything and

the doctors never suspected. They just suspected that he had

been moving his bowels and not telling anyone.

Yossarian had everything he wanted in the hospital. The food

wasn’t too bad,and his meals were brought to him in bed. There

were extra rations of fresh meat,and during the hot part of the

afternoon he and the others were served chilled fruit juice or

chilled chocolate milk. Apart from the doctors and the nurses,no

one ever disturbed him. For a little while in the morning he had

to censor letters,but he was free after that to spend the rest

of each day lying around idly with a clear conscience. He was

comfortable in the hospital,and it was easy to stay on because

he always ran a temperature of 101.

After he had made up his mind to spend the rest of the war

in the hospital,Yossarian wrote letters to everyone he knew

saying that he was in the hospital but never mentioning why.

One day he had a better idea. To everyone he knew he wrote

that he was going on a very dangerous mission.“They asked for

volunteers. It’s very dangerous,but someone has to do it. I’ll

write you the instant I get back.”And he had not written anyone

since.

All the officer patients in the ward were forced to censor

letters written by all the enlisted-men patients,who were kept

in residence in wards of their own. It was a monotonous job,and

Yossarian was disappointed to learn that the lives of enlisted men

were only slightly more interesting than the lives of officers. After

the first day he had no curiosity at all. To break the monotony he

invented games. Death to all modifiers,he declared one day,

and out of every letter that passed through his hands went every

adverb and every adjective. The next day he made war on articles.

He reached a much higher plane of creativity the following day

when he blacked out everything in the letters but a,an and the.

That erected more dynamic intralinear tensions,he felt,and in

just about every case left a message far more universal. Soon he

was proscribing parts of salutations and signatures and leaving

the text untouched. One time he blacked out all but the salutation

“Dear Mary”from a letter,and at the bottom he wrote,“I yearn

for you tragically. R. O. Shipman,Chaplain,U. S. Army.”R.O. Shipman

was the group chaplain’s name.

When he had exhausted all possibilities in the letters,he

began attacking the names and addresses on the envelopes,

obliterating whole homes and streets,annihilating entire

metropolises with careless flicks of his wrist as though he were

God. Catch-22 required that each censored letter bear the

censoring officer’s name. Most letters he didn’t read at all. On

those he didn’t read at all he wrote his own name. On those

he did read he wrote,“Washington Irving”. When that grew

monotonous he wrote,“Irving Washington”. Censoring the

envelopes had serious repercussions,produced a ripple of anxiety

同类推荐
  • 那些给我勇气的句子(每天读一点英文)

    那些给我勇气的句子(每天读一点英文)

    这是一套与美国人同步阅读的中英双语丛书,该丛书由美国英语教师协会推荐,特点有三:内文篇目取自世界上最经典、最有影响的寓言故事,适于诵读,“实战提升”部分,包括单词注解、实用句型和智慧点津。
  • 谜语绕口令英语

    谜语绕口令英语

    谜语和绕口令是英语文学中两种比较独特的语言艺术形式。前者既饶有情趣,又可以启发心智,增进思考和想像能力;后者结构巧妙,诙谐风趣,富有音乐性,最适合口头背诵,深受广大英语读者的喜爱。
  • 娱乐休闲英语口语即学即用

    娱乐休闲英语口语即学即用

    在当今紧张的工作之余,人们总是争取大量的空闲时间来休闲娱乐。在各种娱乐场合,人与人之间容易增进感情,加深关系,促进交往。书中每个单元都设有与内容相关的简单句型结构和短语,并配有多个例句和汉语翻译,便于读者套用和练习。每章开篇都为读者提供了该主题所蕴含的文化背景,方便读者对语言文化的学习。
  • 飞鸟集·新月集

    飞鸟集·新月集

    泰戈尔,印度著名诗人、作家,第一位获得诺贝尔文学奖的亚洲人。世界上最杰出的诗集之一,由名家郑振铎翻译,意境优美、文笔隽永。引领世人探寻真理和智慧的源泉。如同在暴风雨过后的初夏清晨,推开卧室的窗户,看到一个淡泊清透的世界,一切都是那样的清新、亮丽,可是其中的韵味却很厚实,耐人寻味。
  • 摇响青春的风铃(英文爱藏双语系列)

    摇响青春的风铃(英文爱藏双语系列)

    《摇响青春的风铃》带你品味那如水的青春。作为双语读物,《摇响青春的风铃》为中英双语对照版,既是英语学习爱好者、文学爱好者的必备读物,也是忙碌现代人的一片憩息心灵的家园,让读者在欣赏原法原味和凝练生动的英文时,还能多角度、深层次地品读语言特色与艺术之美。
热门推荐
  • 徒儿要矜持

    徒儿要矜持

    此文为甜美的师徒宠文,欢迎入坑~钱瑟瑟,有人说她人如其名,嗜钱如命,为了男色却能抛弃生命。在某日终于应验了这句话,为了一个男人,死了。醒来竟变成了一只狐狸仔,大概上天眷顾,在成了狐狸之后大发善心送了一个美男师父,钱瑟瑟顿时圆满。◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆钱瑟瑟座右铭,为了钱财可以出卖师父,为了美男可以抛弃钱财。某师父大怒,难道为师就不是美男?钱瑟瑟晃指,师父师父,一日为师,终身为父,徒儿不能乱了人伦。——某师父此生目标:竭尽全力垒高墙,防止徒弟爬出墙。节操是什么东西?能绑住徒弟?还是能垒高几米墙。某徒弟此生名言:你有张良计,我有过墙梯。努力架梯爬墙才是王道。——某日早上,某师父醒来发现自己床上竟多了一人。某女人理直气壮:师父,所谓肥水不流外人田。反正你迟早都要给别的女人用,不如先借徒儿用用。某师父狡猾一笑:你想什么时候用就什么时候用。——某徒弟吃干抹净甩甩衣袖打算走人,某师父说:徒儿不打算对为师负责吗?某徒弟大跳:师父家的墙如此之高,徒儿怕进不去。即使进去了,也怕出不来。某师父揽过徒弟小蛮腰:那就别出去了。
  • 倒霉天使的恋爱物语

    倒霉天使的恋爱物语

    最甜美的都市童话。宇宙无敌倒霉丫头苏小钻从来都是迟到大王,清早起床常常会袜子少了一只,出卧室会被拖鞋拌倒,刷牙时牙膏会从后面出来,洗脸的时候水龙头会突然坏掉,出门时就算没迟到也会因为公交车坏掉而迟到,偶尔还会连续一星期被来路不明的大狗追着咬……谁知道这只害她天天做噩梦的动物竟然是她暗恋的桑墨帮忙照顾的……桑墨喜欢穿白色衬衫,拥有世界上最英俊的侧脸以及最温柔的性情和最好的头脑。bt的学校每年都要举行地区联盟年度排行,十个学校分别选出最优秀的学生参加比赛并排名,而桑墨就是这个学校内定的最佳人选。本来完美如桑墨,一切都很平静顺利按部就班。直到……那个总是出状况的苏小钻将满满一盆水浇到他的身上……
  • 皇后大人,您在上

    皇后大人,您在上

    他要找一个皇后,一个可以震得住朝堂,经得起诱惑,管得了后宫,忍得了母后,让所有人满意的女人,她可以没有倾国倾城的容颜,但是一定要由容人之量,还有极强的适应能力。在这复杂深沉的后宫中,一定要能够学会活得长久。他以为,他找不到,可是却在某一天与之相遇。最终——皇后大人在上,朕在下。————————————————某王爷——“我以为你找来只是个皇后,没想到却爬到了众人头上,连心都不知不觉与之靠拢,皇兄你许她任意妄为,整个江山,我能许她的是放弃所坚持的,所执拗的一切,无论你是否相信,也无论你是否放过……。”某无赖男子——“一直以来,我都喜欢陪在你的身边,你做男人我便做女人,你做地痞我便跟着做流氓,你做嫖客,我便坠落风尘投你所好,你要报仇,我就是你手中的那把剑,帮助你斩断一切障碍,不需要顾及我,因为对我而言你才是生命的全部,可是你现在要做那人的皇后,好吧,我是你的侍女,谁也不要想把我赶走,死了……我也是你的人。”某神医——“不要将那再世神医的名号放在我的头上,我并不若你想得那样。我救人是为了她,我杀人也是为了她,说白了,我只是她一个人的医者,因为这里有她,我才会来。看着她幸福与不幸,不会去插手,但是只要她的一句话,我便会带她离开。”————————————————“皇上,三王爷又来了,遇到皇后逃走了……”“皇上,凤鸣使节来挑衅,被打回去了!”“皇上,太后教训皇后,被气得下不了床。”“皇上,四王爷强抢民女被皇后吊在了城门上。”“皇上……”“嘘……这些与朕何干?朕和皇后分工明确,她主外朕主内,朕只管后宫。”“你很开心?很自在?你是皇帝还是我是皇帝?后宫不给我管,他妈的让我管朝政!你有点出息好吗?”“没办法,能者多劳啊,扬长避短嘛!再说,人家……咳……”“靠,又吐血,你丫的林妹妹啊!”“林妹妹?”“风尘女子!”“……”—————————————————————浴血中,她满身的鲜红,身上有着狰狞的伤口,“何苦来着,你在这里拼死拼活,他在后方高枕无忧,他的江山何需要你来维护?!”“他有着后宫佳丽三千,你不过是其中的一位!”“随了朕,朕许你这天下,许你这锦绣山河?!许你这后宫无妃!”“笑话了,江山与我何干,那个死皇帝又与我何干?”“我维护的是我的家人,我的朋友,还有我的男人!”“那,你的父母呢?你的仇恨呢?”
  • 咖啡公主一号店

    咖啡公主一号店

    也是理论满分、操作零分的名不副实咖啡公主!可谁知道,她这个一伪咖啡公主一竟然会被一个有咖啡狂热症的天神给看上,并且该天神还因为喝下她世界第一难喝的咖啡而失去所有的魔力:最恐怖的是,这个天神似乎一神一品不佳,她是人人崇拜的端庄优雅千金大小姐,失去法力后,他以前的老对手全都找上门来算账了!
  • 家有鬼妻

    家有鬼妻

    见鬼啦!一场车祸,将朱可柔带离人世,当她睁眼之时,世界已全然不同。鬼域?冤魂聚集,皆带前世记忆,可为何唯独她缺失记忆,仅仅记得那车祸场景。冥门开启,入冥门,红尘已断,混迹在鬼域,却为何,接连出现迎亲队伍,难道这就是传说中的鬼婚?鬼门大开,百鬼夜行,遗失的记忆,等她找寻。一件件诡异的事接踵而来,看她如何拨开迷雾,解开隐藏在背后的阴谋。当她真心乐于做鬼之时,她却发现自己并非死得其所,遭人暗害?呵,就以她那睚眦必报的心理,能安然不出?这一世,她只想与他安稳一生,却为何有那么多波折。报复?保护?她必让曾经的预言成真!当冷漠无情的男子逼近她时,她以为她连鬼都做不成了。“帅哥,有话好说。”朱可柔魅惑一眼,只求保自己小命。男子却什么话都不说,手中印诀闪现,直逼眼前的女鬼,眼眸中所散发的光芒异常夺目。忽有一日,场景转换。“你老跟着我干嘛?”朱可柔双手叉腰,无比无奈地问道。“怕丢。”男子宠溺地望着朱可柔。“人鬼殊途,我们不可能的。”“做鬼,不难。”男子手起,刀落。简介无能,勿要错过。本文绝对不是恐怖小说,男女主身心干净,一对一。本文不过是一只打不死的女小强杠上无良通灵师,顺带报仇打怪,尔后。。。嘿嘿,你们懂得。摸爬滚打求收藏,乃们要是不收藏,我家柔柔可是会去找你的哦!
  • 萧萧落红

    萧萧落红

    她是不幸人,却有着倾国倾城之貌,她成了当今天子的妃子,却在洞房花烛时,用剑指着他的脖子,不允许碰她。为了共同的目标,她从他的床上,当着妃子的面将他拉走。她对他说,他若爱她,就要让她独冠后宫,她若爱他,必要杀尽他后宫佳丽。一切的温柔背后,竟又是一个阴谋,互不信任,她一次次陷入危机,心一次次被伤。她,又杀了他最敬重的人。踏入江湖,她是神秘组织的接班人,叱咤风云。再见时,却又是刀剑相向,她要的爱太强烈,他是否给得起,他要的爱太虚幻,她是否会相信。最想要得到,却最害怕失去,最容易想起,也最容易忘记,她说爱上她便是万劫不复,最后谁才是那个万劫不复的人。--情节虚构,请勿模仿
  • 重生之俘虏CEO哥哥

    重生之俘虏CEO哥哥

    欧阳娟子和她的养哥哥欧阳强从小就喜欢捉弄别人。十五岁那年欧阳娟子被一辆车给撞飞了起来。就这样一撞,欧阳娟子的灵魂跑进了已经有十七岁的苏如清的身体里。重生后的苏如清就以陌生美女的身份,以超搞笑、超恶作剧的行为来捉弄欧阳强。欧阳强也不是吃素的,他照单全收、并打包加倍奉还。谁输谁赢?结局当然是——
  • 东宫有本难念的经

    东宫有本难念的经

    宝庆十九年春,大佑国皇太子大婚,大将军之女入主东宫。一个不是淑女的将门千金遭遇一个不是文韬武略的中庸太子,到底是佳偶天成,还是冤家路窄?成婚一年不足,太子忽然休妻。迷影重重,生死茫茫,这样一来,还是不是大团圆结局?
  • 罗密欧与朱丽叶

    罗密欧与朱丽叶

    两个家族世代为仇,但双方的儿女罗密欧与朱丽叶却一见钟情。迫于家族之间的仇杀,两人秘密举行了婚礼。后罗密欧因替友复仇刺死了朱丽叶的表哥而被放逐,朱丽叶也面临被逼婚的窘境,服安眠药装死。罗密欧赶回,不明真相,自杀殉情。朱丽叶苏醒以后,见爱人已死,也在悲痛中结束了自己的生命。
  • 傻子王爷无情妃

    傻子王爷无情妃

    一只毒蝎子,彻底断送了她年轻的生命!别人只知道,那个软弱没主见的女人被迫嫁给一个痴傻呆闷的七皇子。殊不知,她早已不再是“她”!面对痴傻只会憨笑的美男,她气愤难填!你傻,本美女就医好你,谁知医好后,遭到嫌弃,却换来一纸休书,气愤之下,她恨不得与他同归于尽……