I Apologize
佚名 / Anonymous
To the woman in the booth behind us—I apologize for my mother.
She isn’t aware she is staring at you “watching you eat.” All she is aware of is the activity around her， and the music of voices raised in conversation. All she is doing is looking around her with the wonder of a child trying to see everything， but without the ability any longer to know that she might offend. I will not deny her the joy she finds in going to dinner although all she will remember is the joy but not what caused it.
To the woman in the grocery store restroom—I apologize for my mother.
Her body has betrayed her. She isn’t aware she has had an accident. Her diaper has to be changed and she has me to help her. Thank goodness that she won’t remember your comments about the odor or the accident. Unfortunately， I will.
To the man in the checkout line—I apologize for my mother.
She is living in a world of 70 years ago. She meant no offense and intended a compliment when she called you a fine looking Negro. Your harsh words will make no difference to her. She can’t remember them and all she will remember is hurting because someone yelled at her.
To the kids on the sidewalk behind us—I apologize for my mother.
She shuffles rather than walks. We go slowly， with her trustingly holding my hand as I did hers when I was a child and these roles were reversed. She can’t hurry up. Pushing her or calling her names cannot make her walk any faster. Her body and her mind are fragile now and neither will be getting any better. So walk around us quietly and hope it will never be you and your mother walking slowly together on the sidewalk.
To Mom’s friends—I apologize for my mother.
She doesn’t remember the you of today. When she sees you when we are out， you are a stranger. She will greet you with the inborn graciousness she has always possessed but she doesn’t know you. The you of yesterday， however， is a source of joy to her as she talks about the things you did together “just last week”.
To the police—I apologize for my mother.
I believe that somewhere inside she knows that something is wrong and she wants to go home. Home is 70 years ago on a farm in North Carolina with her mother and father and three sisters. Thank you for taking the time to understand and bring her back to me when she goes searching for her home.
To my cousins—I apologize for my mother.
As her nieces and nephews she has always loved you all dearly. But she doesn’t know you now. Most of the time she doesn’t know that I am her daughter. A little more of her slips away every day. But as she looks at the family photo albums the love she feels for you has not dimmed.
To my husband—I apologize for my mother，
She has always loved you as a son. I see the pain you feel watching her fade further and further away from us every day. I have watched you build a place for her in our home without a word of thanks from her or even acknowledgement of your accomplishments. I couldn’t do this without you. Your support and love for both of us keeps me going.
I apologize…and I thank you all.
吃饭时坐在我身后的那位女士——我替我母亲向您道歉。
她并不知道自己正目不转睛地 “看您吃东西”。她只能感知她附近的动静，以及人们谈话声。她仅仅是在东张西望，像一个孩子般好奇地看着身边的事物，她再也无法意识到自己可能会打扰他人。我不会剥夺她来餐馆进餐的快活，尽管她只记得快活；至于快活的原因，恐怕她早已忘了。
那位在杂货店卫生间遇到的女士——我替我母亲向您道歉。
她没能控制住自己的身体。她不知道她遇到了麻烦。她不得不换尿布，她让我帮她。感谢上帝，她不会记得您对那气味或那意外所作的评论。可惜的是，我却记得。
那位排队等候付款的男士——我替我的母亲向您道歉。
她的思想还停留在70年前的世界里。当她称您是位漂亮的黑人时，绝不是要侵犯您，而是想称赞您。您刻薄的语言她根本就听不懂，也不会记得，她只能记得有人冲她大声吆喝。
那些人行道上走在我们后面的孩子们——我替我的母亲向你们道歉。
她只能拖着脚慢慢走路，而不能正常行走。我们走得很慢，她就像我小时候紧紧抓住她的手一样，非常信任地紧紧抓住我的手，只不过现在角色变了。她没办法快走。推她、骂她都没有用。她的身体和她的头脑现在都已老化，而且再也不会变好。所以就请安静地从我们身边走过，同时希望你永远不会和你的母亲一起在人行道上缓慢地行走。
母亲的朋友们——我替我的母亲向你们道歉。
她不能记得现在的您。当我们走出家门看到您时，她会把您看成陌生人。她会跟您打招呼，那是因为她天生的和善本性，而不是因为她认出您。然而，一旦她提起你们“就在上周”一起所经历的事情，过去的您，就成了她快乐的源头。
警察——我替我的母亲向您道歉。
我认为她心里明白，她一定出了什么差错，她想回家。这时，她想起的家是70年前位于北卡罗来纳州的一个农场，在那里有她的母亲、父亲和3个姊妹。感谢您在她搜寻她的家时，花费时间去理解她的话，并把她交给我。
我的堂、表兄弟姊妹——我替我的母亲向你们道歉。
她一直深爱着你们，她的侄子、侄女、外甥、外甥女。但是她现在记不得你们了。大部分时间里，她不清楚我是她的女儿。她的身体每天都在退化。但是，当她看到家庭影集时，她对你们的爱没有一点改变。
我的丈夫——我替我的母亲向你道歉。
她一直像爱自己儿子一般爱着你。当你看见她在我们身边一天天衰老退化，我能体会到你所承受的痛苦。我看到了你为她在我们家里腾出了地方，而她连一句感谢的话都没说，甚至没能认可你所做的牺牲。如果没有你的支持，我是做不出这些的。是你对我们母女俩的支持和爱让我能够生活下去。
我道歉……并谢谢所有的人。
记忆填空
1. All she is doing is looking her with the wonder of a child trying to see everything， but the ability any longer to know that she might offend. I will not deny her the she finds in going to dinner although all she will remember is the joy but not what it.
2. her nieces and nephews she has always loved you all dearly. But she doesn’t you now. Most of the time she doesn’t know that I am her . A little more of her slips away every day. But as she looks at the photo albums the love she feels for you not dimmed.
佳句翻译
1. 她只能感知她附近的动静，以及人们谈话声。
2. 我们走得很慢，她就像我小时候紧紧抓住她的手一样，非常信任地紧紧抓住我的手，只不过现在角色变了。
3. 当你看见她在我们身边一天天衰老退化，我能体会到你所承受的痛苦。
短语应用
1. Your harsh words will make no difference to her.
make no difference：没有影响；不起作用；都一样
2. She shuffles rather than walks.
rather than：而不是；宁可……也不愿
