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第19章 Garfield (1)

加菲猫

Never put off the work till tomorrow what you can put off today.

不要等明天交不上差再找借口,今天就要找好。

Love is photogenic. It needs darkness to develop.

爱情就像照片,需要大量的暗房时间来培养。

Selected Scene 1:

Jon:I want you to know,you’re the most important thing in my life.

Garfield:Let me sleep,please.

Jon:Before I met you,my life had no meaning. I was incomplete.

Garfield:Oh,you still are,really.

Jon:I guess what I’m trying to say is... will you marry me?

Garfield:Eh?Marriage?Well,this is kind of sudden. There may be some legal issues here. Look,I like you,but not as a spouse. Maybe as a servant,we could stay together,make it work.

Jon:So what do you say... Liz?

Garfield:Wait a second. Liz?Liz?

Jon:Garfield.

Garfield:Liz is a girl. No,worse. She’s a girl vet.

Jon:Turkey’s ready.

Garfield:Well,I think Jon has touched bottom now. Hmm,we gotta put an end to this torture. Time for a new DJ. Somebody take my temperature.

Jon:Garfield!

Garfield:Whoa! Man,you have changed.

Jon:I can’t have you messing this up for me,okay?

Garfield:Oh,I get it. It’s her/she doesn’t like our music. Whatever happened to Jon?My metal-head guy. My dude. You were so much cooler when you wore a mullet.

Jon:Now stay here.

Garfield:So much cooler. I suppose she likes this haircut.

Jon:Coming!

Garfield:Tell me she likes it the way it is now.

Jon:Hey,Liz.

Liz:Jon,I have incredible news. Guess who’s going to be speaking at this year’s fund-raiser for the royal Animal Conservancy.

Jon:Siegfried and Roy?

Liz:Oh,come on.

Jon:Just Siegfried?

Liz:Jane Goodall dropped out at the last minute because she’s nursing a sick chimp and they asked me. I mean,it’s gonna be at this really cool castle on a huge estate.

Jon:Well,Liz,that... that’s...

Liz:I am flying to London tomorrow morning. Can you believe it?

Jon:What?

Liz:I mean,I have to pack,and... Oh,are these rose petals and candles?

Jon:Yeah,well,Liz,I have,have some... some important news of... of... of my own. Uh...

Garfield:Hey,me,too. Excuse me,do you believe in love at first sight?I was hoping you’d say yes. You have made me so very,very cat-happy.

Jon:Uh...

Liz:Well,come on. What’s the news?

Jon:The news is,I,uh... I finally house-trained Odie.

Liz:Really?

Jon:Yeah.

Liz:That would explain the rose petals. I have to pack. I’m so sorry about dinner. But you know what?I will send your regards to the queen. Okay,congratulations on Odie.

Jon:Oh,oh,yeah. And,hey,you,too. They’re lucky to have you.

Liz:Bye.

Garfield:Oh,I thought she’d never leave.

Jon:Garfield,you ate the whole turkey?

Garfield:Well,yeah.

Jon:What are you doing with this?Oh,never mind. She’s already off to... good staff?

Garfield:Well,come on,cheer up. I saved you the wishbone.

Jon:There’s nothing I can do.

Garfield:Sure there is. Return the ring and get your money back.

Jon:Wait a minute. I’ll go to London.

Garfield:Oh,you poor sap.

Jon:She’ll love it. She’ll be surprised.

Garfield:Please don’t do this.

Jon:She’ll be thrilled.

Garfield:Tell me you’re not gonna do this.

Jon:She’ll say yes.

Garfield:Please,don’t.

Jon:I gotta go pack.

Garfield:You moron. This is a huge mistake,Jon. One of your biggest. Don’t roam. Stay home. Odie and I are not just coming along for the ride,pal. This is actually an intervention.

Jon:Okay,guys. Here we are.

Garfield:Oh,quick flight. We must have been in the jet stream. England is no great shakes,huh?I mean,the buildings here look like,uh,the kennel back home. That is the kennel back home.

Selected Scene 2:

Garfield:Aha! I so knew you weren’t me.

Prince:And you must be Garfield.

Garfield:How do you know my name?

Prince:I’ve lived your life for the past few days. Yes,if ever a man loved a cat,it’s your Jon. Return to him,Garfield. Return to your home.

Garfield:Your Highness,you don’t have to tell me twice. Bye-bye.

Winston:Sir,thank heavens. You’ve returned. The real prince!

Animals:The prince is home,back with us!

Preston:It’s the real prince,the genuine article.

Prince:Yes,my friends,I have returned to you at this,our darkest hour. So,Winny,what exactly is Lord Dargis up to?

Winston:He intends to level our homes and kill us all.

Prince:O... kay. Well,in that case,I decree that we pack our bags and get our scraggy bottoms out of here. Perhaps to the castle next door.

Garfield:Oh,boy.

Animal:What?!

Marten:Well,that was inspirational.

Cow:Brilliant.

McBunny:I am so fired up.

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