登陆注册
670600000039

第39章 儿子与情人 (2)

He told her everything that took place,everything that

was said. It was as if she had been there. And he was dying to

introduce her to these new friends who had dinner at seventhirty

in the evening.

“Go along with you!”she said.“ What do they want to know

me for?”

“They do! ”he cried indignantly.“If they want to know

me — and they say they do — then they want to know you,because

you are quite as clever as I am.”

“Go along with you,child!”she laughed.

But she began to spare her hands. They,too,were workgnarled

now. The skin was shiny with so much hot water,the

knuckles rather swollen. But she began to be careful to keep

them out of soda. She regretted what they had been — so small

and exquisite. And when Annie insisted on her having more

stylish blouses to suit her age,she submitted. She even went so

far as to allow a black velvet bow to be placed on her hair. Then

she sniffed in her sarcastic manner,and was sure she looked a

sight. But she looked a lady,Paul declared,as much as Mrs.

Major Moreton,and far,far nicer. The family was coming on.

Only Morel remained unchanged,or rather,lapsed slowly.

Paul and his mother now had long discussions about life.

Religion was fading into the background. He had shoveled away

all the beliefs that would hamper him,had cleared the ground,

and come more or less to the bedrock of belief that one should

feel inside oneself for right and wrong,and should have the

patience to gradually realize one’s God. Now life interested him

more.

“You know,”he said to his mother,“I don’t want to belong

to the well-to-do middle class. I like my common people best. I

belong to the common people.”

“But if anyone else said so,my son,wouldn’t you be in a

tear. You know you consider yourself equal to any gentleman.”

“In myself,”he answered,”not in my class or my education

or my manners. But in myself I am.’

“Very well,then. Then why talk about the common people?”

“Because — the difference between people isn’t in their class,

but in themselves. Only from the middle classes one gets ideas,

and from the common people — life itself,warmth. You feel their

hates and loves.”

“It’s all very well,my boy. But,then,why don’t you go and

talk to your father’s pals?”

“But they’re rather different.”

Not at all. They’re the common people. After all,whom do you

mix with now — among the common people? Those that exchange

ideas,like the middle classes. The rest don’t interest you.”

“But — there’s the life —”

“I don’t believe there’s a lot more life from Miriam than you

could get from any educated girl — say Miss Moreton? It is you

who are snobbish about class.”

She frankly wanted him to climb into the middle class,a

thing not very difficult,she knew. And she wanted him in the

end to marry a lady.

Now she began to combat him in his restless fretting. He still

kept up his connexion with Miriam,could neither break free nor

go the whole length of engagement. And this indecision seemed

to bleed him of his energy. Moreover,his mother suspected him

of an unrecognized leaning towards Clara,and,since the latter

was a married woman,she wished he would fall in love with

one of the girls in a better station of life. But he was stupid,and

would refuse to love or even to admire a girl much,just because

she was his social superior.

“My boy,”said his mother to him,“All your cleverness,

your breaking away from old things,and taking life in your own

hands,doesn’t seem to bring you much happiness.”

“What is happiness! ”he cried.“ It’s nothing to me! How

am I to be happy?”

The plump question disturbed her.

“That’s for you to judge,my lad. But if you could meet

some good woman who would make you happy — and you began

to think of settling your life — when you have the means — so

that you could work without all this fretting — it would be much

better for you.”

He frowned. His mother caught him on the raw of his wound

of Miriam. He pushed the tumbled hair off his forehead,his eyes

full of pain and fire.

“you mean easy,mother,”he cried.“That’s a woman’s

whole doctrine for life — ease of soul and physical comfort. And I do

despise it.”

“Oh,do you!”replied his mother.“ And do you call yours a

divine discontent?”

“Yes. I don’t care about its divinity. But damn your

happiness! So long as life’s full,it doesn’t matter whether it’s

happy or not. I’m afraid your happiness would bore me. ”

“You never give it a chance,”she said. Then suddenly all her

passion of grief over him broke out.“ But it does matter!”she

cried.“ And you ought to be happy,you ought to try to be happy,

to live to be happy. How could I bear to think your life wouldn’t

be a happy one!

“Your own’s been bad enough,mater,but it hasn’t left you

so much worse off than the folk who’ve been happier. I reckon

you’ve done well. And I am the same. Aren’t I well enough off?”

“You’re not,my son. Battle — battle — and suffer. It’s about

all you do,as far as I can see.”

“But why not,my dear? I tell you it’s the best —”

“It isn’t. And one ought to be happy,one ought.

By this time Mrs. Morel was trembling violently. Struggles

of this kind often took place between her and her son,when she

seemed to fight for his very life against his own will to die. He

took her in his arms. She was ill and pitiful.

“Never mind,Little,”he murmured.“So long as you don’t feel

life’s paltry and a miserable business,the rest doesn’t matter,

happiness or unhappiness.”

She pressed him to her.

“But I want you to be happy,”she said pathetically.

Eh,my dear — say rather you want me to live.

Mrs. Morel felt as if her heart would break for him. At this

rate she knew he would not live. He had that poignant careless

ness about himself,his own suffering,his own life,which

is a form of slow suicide. It almost broke her heart. With all the

passion of her strong nature she hated Miriam for having in

同类推荐
  • 一语多译英语

    一语多译英语

    本书内容丰富,分类明朗。内容涉及日常生活,求职工作,休闲娱乐,出门旅行,友好交际,情感表达等。表达灵活,语言地道。多种灵活的表达,易于吸引读者的学习兴趣,多种表达源于大量英文作品,避免汉语式的英语,是说一口流利、地道英语的最佳选择。形式活泼,易学易用。让读者的学习变得轻松愉快,易于接受。
  • 享受一分钟的感动

    享受一分钟的感动

    本书截取了生活的精彩文章,其中亲情、友情、爱情故事以及励志等文章,能够使你享受生活快乐,体验人生意义的同时,让你树立信心,帮你克服人生路上的各种绊脚石。
  • 娱乐休闲英语口语即学即用

    娱乐休闲英语口语即学即用

    在当今紧张的工作之余,人们总是争取大量的空闲时间来休闲娱乐。在各种娱乐场合,人与人之间容易增进感情,加深关系,促进交往。书中每个单元都设有与内容相关的简单句型结构和短语,并配有多个例句和汉语翻译,便于读者套用和练习。每章开篇都为读者提供了该主题所蕴含的文化背景,方便读者对语言文化的学习。
  • 英文爱藏:天使吻过那片海

    英文爱藏:天使吻过那片海

    《天使吻过那片海》既是英语学习爱好者、文学爱好者的必备读 物,也是忙碌现代人的一片憩息心灵的家园,让读者在欣赏原法原味和凝 练生动的英文时,还能多角度、深层次地品读语言特色与艺术之美,再配 合文章后附加的多功能、全方位巩固题型,更有助于理解并学习英……
  • 社会交往英语口语即学即用

    社会交往英语口语即学即用

    取材于人们所从事的社交活动的方方面面,范围广、实用性强。共包括7个部分:社交惯用语、家庭交往、社会生活、电话交往、商务交往、出行交往和社交语气。希望该书对具有中低层次英语水平的读者提高英语口语水平有所帮助。
热门推荐
  • 娘子乖乖不准闹

    娘子乖乖不准闹

    他是权倾朝野的摄政王,也是暗地为王的夜帝,最大的乐趣就是欺负她,看到她被气得脸色红润,生机活现的样子,他就特乐。欺负她的结果就是恶魔的种子发芽了。恶魔萌宝一出,谁与争锋!“谁敢欺负我娘亲,就得有跟太阳说再见的觉悟!”“哪个狐狸精敢抢我娘亲的男人,我会让你死得很有节奏!”
  • 逆天七界行

    逆天七界行

    有一种执着叫做信念,有一种信念叫做逆天。平凡的地球少年任千寻,一次意外觉醒天赋神通,从此走上修者的道路,被灭满门后,领悟逆天的真意,带着复活亲人的信念,逆天而行,喋血七界,人界,灵界,仙界,神界,圣界,虚无界,至高界。站在巅峰,终成万物之主,掌控万物,无所不能,最后复活亲人。
  • 花开并蒂,浮华声隐

    花开并蒂,浮华声隐

    一对来自桃花村的姐妹,为了追逐梦想,实现自己当歌星的梦,来到城市,开始在娱乐圈打拼,她们参加海选节目,一路博弈,最终获奖,在获奖后姐妹俩却得知了海选的黑幕,姐妹发生争执后各奔东西。此后,她们各自追梦,各自拼搏,历尽坎坷。姐妹俩在经历了各种磨难后,她们终于明白:桃花村还是真正属于她们的地方,在桃花村,她们最终找到了音乐的根和音乐的魂。在桃花树下,她们唱出了最真最美的歌。
  • 兽神战记

    兽神战记

    但是在这浩瀚的宇宙之中也有很多同地球一样可以有生命的星球——那就是美斯星球!一个充满魔法的世界,一个魔兽纵横的星球,征服了整个“猎户空间”!,从异世——到洪荒——到古代——到现在——他,宇宙初开,一个强者争霸的国度。一个最远古最古老的神,经历无数的坎坷,无数的星球也随之诞生,当然地球也在此之中
  • 有梦才有远方

    有梦才有远方

    有梦才有远方,没有梦想的人是世界上最可怜的人之一。《有梦才有远方》中所辑文章,有向命运挑战的呐喊,有为自由而战的宣言,有对苦难与光明的阐释。它们共同奏响了一曲奋斗的主题歌。闽语有:天公疼憨仔。西谚有:自助者天助之。执着于梦想的人,成功绝不会轻易将他遗弃。尼采说:“谁将声震人间,必长久深自缄默;谁将点燃闪电,必长久如云漂泊。”但愿书中的文章,能够重燃您希望的灯火,能够照亮您前行的征程,伴您梦想成真!
  • 自然探谜

    自然探谜

    把兴趣引进课本,使爱好代替讲台,将学生的被动接受知识变为主动学习吸收,激发学生的阅读热情与探索精神,奠定良好的知识基础与创新素质,这就是本套全书的宗旨。
  • 只写给你一个人看的爱情小说

    只写给你一个人看的爱情小说

    一道难以解开的爱情谜题,一场没有第三者的爱情决战。包北宁,自由作者,北上游荡的时候遇见了人大校花梦阳,痞子般的随意招惹却不想换来了“公主”真正的爱情,包北宁的心被梦阳鲜活的爱唤醒。却不想此刻,另一个刻骨铭心的人再次出现——史磊回国了,那个曾经为了自己的梦想丢下包北宁的女子回来了。一样的疯狂,一样的执着,一如继往地让包北宁失控。悲怆却温暖。
  • 傻子王爷无情妃

    傻子王爷无情妃

    一只毒蝎子,彻底断送了她年轻的生命!别人只知道,那个软弱没主见的女人被迫嫁给一个痴傻呆闷的七皇子。殊不知,她早已不再是“她”!面对痴傻只会憨笑的美男,她气愤难填!你傻,本美女就医好你,谁知医好后,遭到嫌弃,却换来一纸休书,气愤之下,她恨不得与他同归于尽……
  • 阿月

    阿月

    阿月七岁前的生活一直很安稳。虽然出身寒门,可父慈母爱,日子平淡和睦。有一天,一个老人推开门扉,自称是她的祖父——当朝大将军。又有一天,亲娘告诉她:“穿越大神来寻,娘要回去了。”阿月大雾,这日子好像要翻天覆地了。简而言之,这是一篇无忧少女宅门记。
  • 巴金的青少年时代

    巴金的青少年时代

    从青年时代闯入文坛,巴金就以火焰般的激情感染着读者。与激情相伴的是他的超常的勤奋与率真:“日也写,夜也写”;坚持说真话;向读者“掏出自己燃烧的心”。正是这三条,激情、勤奋和真诚,铸就了他的人格和事业,也使他成为中国“二十世纪的良心”。这本由阎焕东编著的《巴金的青少年时代》是一本描述巴金青少年时代的学习与生活的普及性读物。本书的特点是故事性强,叙事生动活泼,说理明白晓畅。它是我们献给中、小学生和广大青年最丰腴的精神食粮。