登陆注册
670600000066

第66章 第二十二条军规 (1)

Catch-22

故事发生在第二次世界大战期间,美国空军的

一支飞行大队驻守在意大利以南地中海上的一个小岛

上。主人公约塞连是这支飞行大队的上尉轰炸手。他

本来是一个正直勇敢、富有爱国心的青年。起初,他

抱着为祖国而战的信念,出色地完成了任务,因而被

提拔为上尉,还获得了一枚勋章。后来他发现周围的

人都在暗算他,企图置他于死地。他竭力要保全自己

的生命,他要逃离这个“世界”。最后,约塞连恍然大悟,

第二十二条军规原来是一个骗局,他临阵逃脱,跑到

瑞典去寻找避难所。

[ 美] 约瑟夫·海勒( Joseph Helle)

The Texan

It was love at first sight.

The first time Yossarian saw the chaplain he fell madly in

love with him. Yossarian was in the hospital with a pain in his liver

that fell just short of being jaundice. The doctors were puzzled

by the fact that it wasn’t quite jaundice. If it became jaundice they

could treat it. If it didn’t become jaundice and went away they

could discharge him. But this just being short of jaundice all the

time confused them.

Each morning they came around,three brisk and serious

men with efficient mouths and inefficient eyes,accompanied by

brisk and serious Nurse Duckett,one of the ward nurses who

didn’t like Yossarian. They read the chart at the foot of the bed

and asked impatiently about the pain. They seemed irritated when

he told them it was exactly the same.

“Still no movement?”the full colonel demanded.

The doctors exchanged a look when he shook his head.

“Give him another pill.”Nurse Duckett made a note to give

Yossarian another pill,and the four of them moved along to the

next bed. None of the nurses liked Yossarian. Actually,the pain

in his liver had gone away,but Yossarian didn’t say anything and

the doctors never suspected. They just suspected that he had

been moving his bowels and not telling anyone.

Yossarian had everything he wanted in the hospital. The food

wasn’t too bad,and his meals were brought to him in bed. There

were extra rations of fresh meat,and during the hot part of the

afternoon he and the others were served chilled fruit juice or

chilled chocolate milk. Apart from the doctors and the nurses,no

one ever disturbed him. For a little while in the morning he had

to censor letters,but he was free after that to spend the rest

of each day lying around idly with a clear conscience. He was

comfortable in the hospital,and it was easy to stay on because

he always ran a temperature of 101.

After he had made up his mind to spend the rest of the war

in the hospital,Yossarian wrote letters to everyone he knew

saying that he was in the hospital but never mentioning why.

One day he had a better idea. To everyone he knew he wrote

that he was going on a very dangerous mission.“They asked for

volunteers. It’s very dangerous,but someone has to do it. I’ll

write you the instant I get back.”And he had not written anyone

since.

All the officer patients in the ward were forced to censor

letters written by all the enlisted-men patients,who were kept

in residence in wards of their own. It was a monotonous job,and

Yossarian was disappointed to learn that the lives of enlisted men

were only slightly more interesting than the lives of officers. After

the first day he had no curiosity at all. To break the monotony he

invented games. Death to all modifiers,he declared one day,

and out of every letter that passed through his hands went every

adverb and every adjective. The next day he made war on articles.

He reached a much higher plane of creativity the following day

when he blacked out everything in the letters but a,an and the.

That erected more dynamic intralinear tensions,he felt,and in

just about every case left a message far more universal. Soon he

was proscribing parts of salutations and signatures and leaving

the text untouched. One time he blacked out all but the salutation

“Dear Mary”from a letter,and at the bottom he wrote,“I yearn

for you tragically. R. O. Shipman,Chaplain,U. S. Army.”R.O. Shipman

was the group chaplain’s name.

When he had exhausted all possibilities in the letters,he

began attacking the names and addresses on the envelopes,

obliterating whole homes and streets,annihilating entire

metropolises with careless flicks of his wrist as though he were

God. Catch-22 required that each censored letter bear the

censoring officer’s name. Most letters he didn’t read at all. On

those he didn’t read at all he wrote his own name. On those

he did read he wrote,“Washington Irving”. When that grew

monotonous he wrote,“Irving Washington”. Censoring the

envelopes had serious repercussions,produced a ripple of anxiety

同类推荐
  • 灵魂也有一席之地(英文爱藏双语系列)

    灵魂也有一席之地(英文爱藏双语系列)

    拥有信心,所有的事情才有可能成功。缺乏信心,即便是最微小的挑战,都会显得无法逾越,难以克服。本书收录的百则经典哲理美文,其内容涉及人生的方方面面,它们有的睿智凝练,让心灵为之震撼;有的灵气十足,宛如一线罅隙中奔涌而出的清泉,悄然渗入心田。
  • 英文爱藏:天使吻过那片海

    英文爱藏:天使吻过那片海

    《天使吻过那片海》既是英语学习爱好者、文学爱好者的必备读 物,也是忙碌现代人的一片憩息心灵的家园,让读者在欣赏原法原味和凝 练生动的英文时,还能多角度、深层次地品读语言特色与艺术之美,再配 合文章后附加的多功能、全方位巩固题型,更有助于理解并学习英……
  • 谜语绕口令英语

    谜语绕口令英语

    谜语和绕口令是英语文学中两种比较独特的语言艺术形式。前者既饶有情趣,又可以启发心智,增进思考和想像能力;后者结构巧妙,诙谐风趣,富有音乐性,最适合口头背诵,深受广大英语读者的喜爱。
  • 那些妙趣横生的故事(每天读一点英文)

    那些妙趣横生的故事(每天读一点英文)

    《每天读一点英文·那些妙趣横生的故事》是一套与美国人同步阅读的中英双语丛书。特点有三:内文篇目收录了最精彩、最新鲜的笑话;“实战提升”部分,包括单词和词组、知道不知道,让你捧腹大笑的同时,丰富知识面; 附赠地道美语朗读MP3光盘。 本书幽默逗趣,文字浅显易懂,让你笑着学英文!
  • 玩转生活英语

    玩转生活英语

    本书是一本涵盖日常生活的英语口语书籍。全书信息量丰富,趣味性强,适合不同英语阶段的学习者使用。本书在内容编排上为了帮助读者巩固和提高英语能力,专门设计了“跟我练”栏目,保证能活学活用。
热门推荐
  • 我说你看

    我说你看

    本书内容包括:社会这棵树、乱套了、恨郎不狼、坟头上的风景、抢救男人、楼的高度、草的级别、老的疏放、动物表演、鸟语兽言、蛤蟆三条腿等内容。
  • 傻子王爷无情妃

    傻子王爷无情妃

    一只毒蝎子,彻底断送了她年轻的生命!别人只知道,那个软弱没主见的女人被迫嫁给一个痴傻呆闷的七皇子。殊不知,她早已不再是“她”!面对痴傻只会憨笑的美男,她气愤难填!你傻,本美女就医好你,谁知医好后,遭到嫌弃,却换来一纸休书,气愤之下,她恨不得与他同归于尽……
  • 7天让你读懂社交心理学

    7天让你读懂社交心理学

    心理学是帮助人们了解自我、洞察人生、解释行为的一门实用科学。人的心理千变万化,这也使得人的心理现象成为一个极为复杂和奇妙的领域。但通过大量的试验以及经验的总结证明,人类的心理活动仍然是有一定规律的,人们对心理现象事实上都很熟悉,只不过由于缺乏科学的理解,因此觉得神秘罢了。
  • 腹黑少爷:宝贝快投降

    腹黑少爷:宝贝快投降

    我们……我们……”金艾恋干笑了一下:“我们能不以这样的姿势说话吗?”“不可以。”何少寒霸道的说,轻微的呼吸打在她的额头。“可是……可是……”金艾恋显然有点不好意思。而何少寒怎么可能会放过如此可爱的她那,他可是最喜欢她害羞的样子了。“你说你爱不爱我啊?”何少寒趴在金艾恋的身上,抬起她的下巴,让她与自己彻底的对视。“你……你爱不爱我……啊?”“爱啊——”他的语气极度的暧昧,眼神是那么的邪恶:“那你那?爱我吗?”
  • 新娘酷又拽

    新娘酷又拽

    十三岁,她喊他大叔,十四岁,她总爱破坏他的好事,十五岁,一杯药酒,她设计了他,从此爱上狼与小羊的游戏,十六岁,他傍上了别人,她离家出走。二十岁,她成了他的情人,原来,她一直逃不开,从他买下她的那天开始,一切都已经注定,就算拼命想躲都躲不掉!
  • 小公主

    小公主

    是一部灰姑娘式的儿童小说,写的是19世纪的故事。既刻画了心地善良、不怕困苦的萨拉,使人对她又是同情又是佩服,又对明卿女士那种势利小人作了淋漓尽致的讽刺。
  • 一生一世:妖孽王戏盗墓妃

    一生一世:妖孽王戏盗墓妃

    :我有喜了。:你是男人,哦不,你连男人都不是,一个宦官有什么喜?宦官确实有喜了,不过这孩子是谁的?一二三四五六七,七个皇子,总有一个是他爹吧?当所有的阴谋退去,所谓的怀疑,不过是自卑与逃避,曾经以为,坚守与否,自己只是路过这一场盛世繁华,最后谁与谁君临天下,锦衣华发,都与她无关,可是待她看清一切,却已天人两隔……
  • 平常心做人,进取心做事

    平常心做人,进取心做事

    做人常怀一颗平常心,做事常有一颗进取心。如果没有平常心,行走在人生中就会患得患失,自私自利、心灵难有真平静。修平常心,是为了更好的进取,否则人生将在原点打转,永远看不到山顶的风景。取平常心,救治时代浮躁病,辟一方净土诗意栖居;持进取心,超越生命的平庸,创一番事业笑傲人生。
  • 冷面邪王:傲世毒妃别想逃

    冷面邪王:傲世毒妃别想逃

    一朝穿越,顶级特工的她成为安定侯府废材庶女三小姐。涅槃重生,她已不是那个任打任骂的废物。凡欺她者,她必反欺之!绝不留情!凡辱她者,她必让那人!身首异处!凡害她者,她必会杀之!不留后患!虽然她心狠手辣,对付的都是害她之人,又怎会招惹了那只妖孽强大的腹黑男;无论她逃到哪里,他都能随时出现在她面前,“娘子,你偷了我的心,一辈子都别想逃出我的五指山!”从此,她驭万兽,炼神丹,制神器,凤逆天下,傲世苍穹!从此,他护她,宠她,纵容她,碧落黄泉,天上地下,生死相随。修炼之路,漫漫无期,而她有神兽相随,美男相伴,只是,且行且珍惜。
  • 娘子视财如命

    娘子视财如命

    只要是钱,通通要!!只要是美男,通通要!!她左手钱袋子,右手金算盘,身后是一帮极品美男!小小十岁女娃,敛财敛色堪称一流!人称江南第一钱袋子色女郎!人见人嚎,鬼见鬼跳墙!见他还有三分姿色,捡了勉强放进收藏,没想到,脏兮兮的乞丐洗干净了竟是天仙下凡!嘿嘿,美男,美男,又能看来又能赚但她却偏偏破天荒不让这极品佳人抛头露面,养在家里吃闲饭!既然是赔钱货,那就……那就对他上下其手,浑水摸鱼吃豆腐……、