登陆注册
1089100000022

第22章 过有意义的人生 (6)

亲人们总是将他们的问题在即将抉择的那刻提出,然后等待我给出建议。我不喜欢在这样的情况回答问题,假如说他们愈加僵化,那就等于说自己大无可用之处了。我尽可能地作出回答,并祈祷我的建议能对他们有所帮助。然而,我又怎能知道所有的事情?这和给女儿建议不同,给父母建议需要设身处地地思考。他们向我咨询,就是对我的信任,正如我一直相信他们那样。

我是一名高中老师,我的学生将会考入大学,或参军,或工作。每天,都会有学生问我如何规划未来之类的问题,而不是咨询如何学好功课。很多人还未意识到,高中毕业是人生的关键转折点之一。的确如此,这些年轻的孩子正在离开一个占据他们生命四分之三的时代。

因此,在他们离开校园的那一刻,我告诉他们,什么行业是朝阳行业,他们要服什么样的兵役,以便实现自己的梦想。有时,我只告诉这些年轻的孩子,生活是美好的,他们正幸运地处于人生最美好的阶段,即将长大成人,应该说是很幸运的。每次他们离开时,我都祈祷自己给予他们好的建议。我知道,我尽力了。

偶尔,素不相识的人也向我征求建议。学生家长常会问我,怎样做才会使孩子前途光明。有时也会问,怎样才能让孩子听他们的话或者相信他们。我想,他们之所以问我,是因为他们确信我知道答案,或者他们看到我的头发白了,胡子也白了,就相信我这个岁数足以解决这些问题。

韦氏关于“建议”一词的定义中最主要的问题是——没考虑建议者。给出建议的人理解这个问题吗?能帮忙解决吗?我给过女儿、父母、学生和陌生人正确的答案吗?

我觉得我该打电话给女儿了,向她征求些建议。

每个人都会有需要建议的时候。当他人出于信任向你请教时,要认真地帮助他,这种信任多么美好。当你需要帮助时,不要担心,一定有爱你的人随时准备替你分忧。

1. When my daughter was small I looked forward_________ giving her advice. In fact, I sincerely believe that she_________ enjoyed it. For the most important thing a Dad can do is get his child ready for life._________ that I ever thought I was ready but at least I have been able to survive my years, so far.

2. In fact, I am a high school_________ who works with young adults who are about to embark on careers that include college, the military, or_________. Every day I am asked questions concerning_________ they should organize for their futures, away from a life that centered on their public school.

1. 女儿小的时候,我渴望能给她建议。

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

2. 让孩子对生活有所准备,是父亲最重要的事情。

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

3. 偶尔,素不相识的人也向我征求建议。

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

1. It was as though our separation necessitated that she would once again need, and seek out, my advice.

seek out:搜出;找出;想获得

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

2. In other words, it is a little quieter than a whisper.

in other words:换句话说,也就是说,换言之

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

生活态度最重要

One’s Life Attitude Is Important

拉塞尔?康威 / Russell Conwell

I was attending a seminar in Sydney in April and picked up a lecture note. In it was a reflection on “Attitude”.

Let me quote the anonymous writer:

“The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than fact. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, intelligence or skill. It will make or break a company, a church or a home.

“The remarkable thing is that we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is to play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude.

“I am convinced that life is 10 percent what happens to me and 90 percent how I react to it. And so it is with you. You are in charge of your attitude.”

This means that no matter what happens to you, it is how you react or respond to it that is important.

You can’t control or influence certain events in life—earthquake, sabotage, terrorist bombings, being struck by lightning, a freak traffic accident and so on. But you can control how you think and feel about such incidents, even when you are the unfortunate victim of an accident.

You can choose to moan and groan about your misfortune, about what you have lost physically or financially. Or you can choose to count your blessings that you are still alive, that you have most of your physical or mental faculties. A prolonged negative attitude would make you miserable and regressive whereas a change to a positive attitude would spur you to think of possibilities.

You could be taunted or discriminated against if you lost a leg, arm or an eye. You can’t help some insensitive people doing such things. If you fret over what is said and what has been deprived of you, does it make you any happier, determined, persevering or resourceful?

The right attitude to take is not to let insults, sarcasm, rudeness, ridicule or mockery bother you. Why respond negatively to such behaviours of other people? It doesn’t pay to strike back contemptuously at them. If you do, you are showing that you are emotionally weaker.

Show that you are emotionally stronger, that you do not have to trade insults with insults, that what they say or do does not bother you at all. Show the dignity that they do not have.

The pain is not in what the insensitive people say about you or do to belittle you. The pain is in how you interpret and react to such acts.

Very often, we negatively over-react to, or “read” too much into, what people say or do. It’s a case of seeing what we want to see, regarding an issue as big when it could really be insignificant.

Even if people in reality are downright inhuman, you can choose to ignore their behaviour or not view it negatively at all. That is real self mastery.

Losing a part of the body is not the end of life. It might be the end of a career that you were trained in and the beginning of a new career but again, it might not. If the famous Stephen Hawking can speak through a computer gadget, if a golfer can still play with a metal arm, then a trainer who loses both legs or arms can still find some other ways to teach.

When you lose hope, when you despair, when you blame people all the time, when you do not even want to try and persevere, then you choose to make life meaningless for yourself.

同类推荐
热门推荐
  • 优秀员工不可不知的12个人

    优秀员工不可不知的12个人

    成功的因素有很多种,实力、机遇、人脉、背景……但是,成功的结果只有一种,那就是不仅战胜了自己,更感染了他人。李开复、唐骏、李彦宏、陈永正……他们并非占尽天时地利的幸运儿,亦非天赋异禀的神童。他们今天的成就同样经历了种种考验、艰难取舍和痛苦挣扎。但正因为如此,他们的成功对所有正在风雨中前行的人们而言,更具参考意义和借鉴价值。仔细阅读《优秀员工不可不知的12个人》,它将带给你完全不一样的心灵体验。
  • 嫡女棣王妃

    嫡女棣王妃

    “姨娘,夫人似乎断气了~”“哼!这么一碗药都下去了,难道她还能活着不成?”“那这······”一个年纪稍长的人朝着这位称作姨娘的人示意了一下自己手中的婴儿,似乎有些犹豫,“这好歹是个男孩,现在夫人已经死了,如果姨娘把他占为己有,然后得了这府中的中馈······”“嬷嬷?!”女子也不等她的话说完,就打断了她,“你记住了,我恨死了这个女人,她的儿子,只能随着她去,我就是以后自己生不出儿子,抱养别人的,也不会要她的。把他给我扔马桶里面溺了,对外就说一出生就死了!”猩红的嘴唇,吐出来的话却是格外的渗人。嬷嬷还想说什么,动了动嘴,却是一句话也没有说,转身朝着后面放着马桶的地方走去。却是没有发现旁边地上一个穿着有些破旧的衣服的小女孩此刻正瞪大了眼睛看着她们两。这是什么情况?自己不是被炸死了吗?怎么会······于此同时,脑中不断有记忆闪现出来,她们是自己的母亲和刚出生的弟弟啊?!不行,先救人。转头看见旁边谁绣花留下的针线跟剪刀,想到自己前世的身手,拿起一根绣花针就朝着那个嬷嬷飞了过去,却在半路上掉落下来,暗骂一声,这人是什么破身体。却引得那两个人听见动静看了过来。女人阴狠的盯着她,“你居然没有死?”微微眯起眼睛,自己的前身也是被她们弄死的了,看样子她们谁也不会放过,抓起旁边的剪刀就冲了过去。随着几声惨叫声,从此以后,府中府外都传遍了她的“美名”——凤家大小姐心肠歹毒,刺伤了府中无数的人,宛如一个疯子。
  • 真龙气2

    真龙气2

    民初,张天师携子南下寻找真龙气,引出一场千古未有的奇事。民国第一相士袁度,为何隐居江南小镇?化外奇人蓝云天,为何踏足中原?天师传人之争,六十三代天师究竟谁来执掌?天下龙脉精华,真龙气究竟在何处?一切的一切,尽在《真龙气》。
  • 现代神人

    现代神人

    ,在突破了异界神界的结界来到仙界。使他在仙界成了无人敢管的逍遥仙,突破禁地获得了混沌神的传承,在异界经过努力建立了自己的帝国,成了异界的神,来到在神界受到众神的排挤回到了自己的家乡成了一个小小的星球守护神,用自己在异界获得的不同的仙元力大战群仙,一次意外使他有了强壮的身体一次事故使他来到异界,过上了逍遥的生活
  • 穷理查年鉴:一生必知的475句智慧箴言

    穷理查年鉴:一生必知的475句智慧箴言

    本书精选1733年~1758年的穷理查智慧格言,分门别类整理,为每一个人带来累积财富、识人读心、待人处世、成功人生、稳固爱情、幸福生活等的智慧秘诀和生命哲学,迎接富足的全新人生。全文幽默逗趣、一针见血且深入人心!
  • 小妻大妾

    小妻大妾

    (完结)当纵横商界的白领穿越成二八年华的新婚小妻子,再对上风流倜傥的腹黑男,当妖媚阴险的姨奶奶私吞了大半的家产再瞄上温文尔雅的管家大叔,还有那些花痴婆子草痴丫头们再加上亲戚朋友一大堆男女老幼,都想着浑水摸鱼一起来搅合一番,这小日子会何等的精彩?鸡飞狗跳的大宅门生活有木有?精彩无比的男女双斗大法有木有?你阴她险我算计的好戏连台有木有?闲看落花静品香茗的美好生活有木有?《小妻大妾》里精彩绝伦的大事小事和男人女人乐在‘斗’中的甜蜜生活有木有?
  • 夏日温存

    夏日温存

    这是有关几位青年人的故事,所谓他们的青春,所谓他们的怀念,都在上演,故事不够唯美。想要的悲伤不够悲,美好的结局不够美,但这是我最好的故事。
  • 无敌大小姐

    无敌大小姐

    当现代阴狠毒辣,手段极多的火家大小姐火无情,穿越到一个好色如命,花痴草包大小姐身上,会发生怎样的化学反应?火无情一醒过来就发现,自己竟然在众目睽睽之下上演脱衣秀。周围还有一群围观者。这一发现,让她极为不爽。刚刚穿好衣服,便看到一个声称是自家老头的老不死气势汹汹的跑来问罪。刚上来,就要打她。这还得了?她火无情从生自死,都是王者。敢动她的人,都在和阎王喝茶。于是,她一怒之下,打了老爹。众人皆道:火家小姐阴狠毒辣,竟然连老爹都不放在眼里。就这样,她的罪名又多了一条。蛇蝎美人。穿越后,火无情的麻烦不断。第一天,打了爹。第二天,毁了姐姐的容。第三天,骂了二娘。第四天,当众轻薄了天下第一公子。第五天,火家贴出招亲启事:但凡愿意娶火家大小姐者,皆可去火府报名。来者不限。不怕死,不想活的,欢迎前来。警示:但凡来此,生死皆与火家无关。若有残病者火家一律不负法律责任。本以为无人敢到,岂料是桃花朵朵。美男个个很妖娆一号美人:火无炎。火家大少爷。为人不清楚,手段不清楚。容貌不清楚。唯一清楚的是,他有钱。有多多的钱。火无情语录:钱是好东西。娶了。(此美男,由美瞳掩饰不了你眼神的空洞领养。)火老爷一气之下,昏了过去。家门不幸,家门不幸啊。二号美人:竹清月。江湖人称天上神仙,地上无月。大国师一枚。美得惊天动地。火无情语录:美人好,尤其是自带嫁妆又会预测未来的美人,娶了。(此美男,由东de琳琳领养)三号美人:轩辕子玉。当朝七皇子,游历四国。一张可爱无敌的脸。单纯至极。火无情语录:可爱的孩子好,可爱又乖巧的孩子更好。可爱乖巧又不用给钱的孩子,娶了。(此美男,由刘千绮领养)皇帝听闻,两眼一抹黑。他的儿啊。怎么就这么不争气呢。四号美人:天下第一美男。性格不详,籍贯不详。火无情语录:谜一样的美人,她喜欢。每天都有新鲜感。娶了。(此美男,由告别的爱情li领养。)五号美人:天下第一名伶。火无情语录:解风情的美男,如果没钱花把他卖了都不用调教。娶了。(此美男由伊眸领养。)六号美男:解忧楼楼主。相貌不详,身世不详。爱好杀人。火无情语录:凶恶的美人,她喜欢。娶了。(此美男由陈铭铭领养)七号美男:琴圣。貌如谪仙,琴音杀人。冷清眸子中,百转千回,说尽风流。(此美男由伊眸领养)夜杀:天下第一杀手。(此美男由静寂之夜领养)
  • 男人魅力

    男人魅力

    美丽和梦想不只属于女人。男人的美丽和梦想,时常比女人的美丽与梦想更丰富、更精彩。男人的美丽多半在他的精神,在他的骨质,在他内心的力量和畅想之中。
  • 告诉你一个托尔斯泰的故事

    告诉你一个托尔斯泰的故事

    精选了托尔斯泰人生中富有代表性的事件和故事,以点带面,从而折射出他充满传奇的人生经历和各具特点的鲜明个性。通过阅读《告诉你一个托尔斯泰的故事》。我们不仅要了解他的生活经历,更要了解他的奋斗历程,以及学习他在面对困难、失败和挫折时所表现出来的杰出品质。